Lament is Also Prayer

Rejoice always.. give thanks in all circumstances..1 Thessalonians 1

One of my old college friends who is in possession of a wicked sense of humor, decided to counter-balance the online proliferation of “Daily Gratitudes” (sic) with “Daily Ingratitudes.” Some are bitter and maybe a little mean, but others are  beautiful and speak  profoundly to darkness and pain. Others, like this one, were funny:

I am ungrateful for things that don't understand that "inside the house" is not for them, even though you say it to them, you haul them outdoors, you construct barriers, you encourage vibrant predatory life to torment and eat them, you hope. And yet, there's the cockroach saying "oh hai, is this that 'indoors' thing you don't want me to be in?"

Even in the midst of “rejoicing always,” we still need to name, for ourselves and God, those things and times causing us to lament.

[Some of mine: people who do not use their turn signals, the disastrous traffic at the Chick-Fil-A across from Piedmont Hospital, canned Asparagus, televangelists, “holiday music”, “Bro-Country”, smog,  I am also not grateful for cancer, diseases in general that kill people (like Parkinson’s disease- one that effects my Mom), war, starvation, income inequality and certain politicians who shall go unnamed].  

Paul is right- rejoice and give thanks, always, but also find room in your life for lament.

Paul was no stranger to pain, and I suspect that he probably lamented aplenty. He describes a pain or a  “thorn in his side” (what  might have been epilepsy, depression, migraines or some other physical or emotional issue in one of his letters, saying:

^“I pleaded with the Lord three times for it to leave me alone. ⁹ He said to me, “My grace is enough for you, because power is made perfect in weakness.” So I’ll gladly spend my time bragging about my weaknesses so that Christ’s power can rest on me. ¹⁰ Therefore, I’m all right with weaknesses, insults, disasters, harassments, and stressful situations for the sake of Christ, because when I’m weak, then I’m strong. (2 Cor 12:8-10)

Before he was able to see God at work in his pain, he lamented (“pleaded”) and wanted it to go away. He later reconciles himself to his "thorn," but he never blames God for it or says that God was “teaching him a lesson.” 

Paul and I may have the whole migraine thing in common. Many times I have asked God to take them away and they have persisted.  (Good medicine, healthier living, exercise, and meditation- all gifts from God- have helped me control them). I have also found lots of grace within the pain I have felt. I may have even found “power in weakness” by learning to calm my mind and find greater self-compassion within my “thorn.” Yet, you will never find me thanking God when I have one or rejoicing. (Probably quite the opposite). Migraines are dark, awful, and yucky.

Lamenting their presence in my life to God has helped me own them as a reality, though, and find healing (and perhaps even, in retrospect, gratitude). 

Rejoice, always, name your “gratitudes”, but also know that God hears lament-  the cry of our hearts- our pain- as prayer, too.